RetroGame FunClub: 2010-10-10

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Tetris Attack

Retro(game)spective

Every day Ben “Ben Pack” Pack or one of his brave compatriots will play a retro game, and break it down for you. That’s right, every day. To complain about us eventually missing a day or suggest your own, go ahead and comment below the article, or email us at retrogamefunclub@gmail.com.

10/13/2010

The Game: Tetris Attack

Because he's attacking the Tetris? Tetri? Tetrominos?

Release Year: 1996

Skewes: SNES, Game Boy

So what’s it like: "Tetris Attack" is a Yoshi-themed puzzle game for the SNES. Following the success of "Yoshi Cookie," Nintendo released this puzzle game that, aside from the game, really isn't like "Tetris" at all.

Those blocks are so shocked!

The main mechanic of the game is that different colored blocks are raising from the bottom up, and you have to match three or more to make them disappear by switching blocks horizontally. If playing against an opponent, clearing multiple blocks at once or linking together the clearing of blocks, you will create barriers that can only be destroyed by clearing blocks adjacent to them. There are various modes, but the main mode is a Vs. mode where you must fight against several opponents and eventually take down Bowser.

Dr. Freezegood is my favorite Batman villain/underground rapper.

The game is fun, and challenging. The Vs. mode is easy enough, but when you get to the higher levels you will find yourself dying often. There is a puzzle mode which, to this day, I could still not beat. The game is fun, and especially so with a friend.

Should you go back: Yes.

Should this game be remade: Yes. Make an iPhone version, for goodness sakes.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Spider-Man and Venom: Maximum Carnage

If you weren't scared of this as a child, you aren't human.

Release Year: 1994

Skewes: SNES, Sega Genesis

So what’s it like: "Spider-Man and Venom: Maximum Carnage," is a video game adaptation of a comic series of the same name. In the game you play as Spider-Man, and eventually Venom, and try to take down the symbiotic known as Carnage, before he murders all of New York City.

Mr. Schwarzenegger from "Commando" would like to have a word with you.

The game is a side-scroller beat 'em up. The game is pretty standard as those types come, with little variation. You can swing as Spider-Man, but since the levels are so short (unless they are the impossibly hard climbing levels), these are useless. You can bring enemies to you or create a shield with your web, but you are best just keeping to your basic punches and kicks. There are lots of bosses, most of them are aggravating, as you have to often fight them two at a time.

Alright Spidey, here's your chance. Don't fuck this one up.

This game is hard, but not "I can beat this if I keep doing it enough" hard. You don't regain lives or health when you beat levels, you can get looped into infinite combos by enemies. There's nothing interesting or innovative of this game, so I wouldn't be upset if it was forgotten in time.

I get it. You're based on a comic book.

Should you go back: No. Go play Final Fight.

Should this game be remade: No.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers

Release Year: 1990

Skewes: NES

So what’s it like: Following the key of most NES licensed games, "Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers" is a side-scrolling (I'm really getting tired of that word) action platformer (those too). You can play as either Chip or Dale, or with a friend. An evil scientist has stolen fellow Rescue Ranger Gadget, and is using her to create something that would... look to be honest I don't know because I couldn't beat the game.

Well thanks for telling me where you hid her...

The game is hard. Full of cheap kills while jumping over obstacles, this is a old-school platformer in every way of the word. The main mechanic besides jumping, is grabbing and throwing items ranging from boxes, to apples. You use these to defeat various animal enemies. The game is hard and cheap, but that was half the fun of games from that era. The game is hard, but not impossibly hard. One of the best parts of this game is that it's one of the earliest instances of girefing in games, as you can throw objects at your partner.

Holy shit ninja squirrels!

Should you go back: Yes. You don't have to beat it, but give it a try.

I don't even know...

Should this game be remade: Yes, because the "Rescue Rangers" is such a prominent pop culture icon. Just kidding.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Claymates

Holographic box holy shiiiiiit.

Release Year: 1993

Skewes: SNES

So what’s it like: "Claymates" is not an erotically themed clay magazine, but rather a platformer for the SNES. The game was published by interplay, and is a predacessor to the :ClayFighter" games. It is the first game in this feature that I never played as a child, so remember this is coming from someone with no nostalgia for this game.

I am a big blue ball of clay trying to fist a squirrel-dog. What have I gotten myself into?

"Claymates" is very similar in style to "Kid Chameleon" You play as Clayton (get it?), a young boy who gets turned into a ball of clay after a mad scientist steals your dad's formula that turns clay alive. So you must traverse different lands as a piece of clay, collecting power-ups that turn you into different animals with different abilities.

Did I just turn into a rat with a supersonic bark?

This game isn't the best. The controls are really floaty, which cause you to get hit, alot. That is a huge problem in istelf because if you get while you're just a clay ball, you die; but if you have an animal upgrade you only revert back to the ball. The problem with that is the power-ups are so few and far between taht you will be dying a whole lot. There is also an overworld which has puzzles, but they are easy and prove to be more of an annoyance than a challenge or something fun.

No.

Should you go back: No. As far as platformers go, there are many more competent ones out there. Go play those. Or just play Super Mario World again.

Should this game be remade: Nope. This game might have been serviceable at the time, but if you never played it as a kid, don't bother going back.

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