Retro(game)spective - Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom

Every day Ben “Ben Pack” Pack or one of his brave compatriots will play a retro game, and break it down for you. That’s right, every day. To complain about us eventually missing a day or suggest your own, go ahead and comment below the article, or email us at retrogamefunclub@gmail.com.

2/15/2011

The Game: Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom

Note: Less cool dudes and fire, more Shotround.

Release Year: 1987

Skewes: NES (and a whole bunch of different versions, but I played the NES one)

So what’s it like: Last week I played a surprisingly fun cross-medium tie-in video game. This week I was not so lucky. I ended up playing Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom for the NES.

If I had a nickle for every time I've heard "touch kid to see prize"...

Temple of Doom is a sidescrolling platformer where Indie must collect a bunch of shirtless boys before time comes up. Yeah, I know, it's creepy. Even creepier than Michael Jackson's Moonwalker. Seriously the goal of every level is to pull shirtless boys out of small holes, where they will reward you with keys, knives, or other random items. There are two main segments, a platforming part and a minecart part. The integration between the two is confusing, as there is no map and you end up wandering around aimlessly. The platforming is terrible, whenever you jump, you jump forward and down. And every level has dangerous lava below. So unless you are pressed against the wall, jumping will kill you instantly. This game isn't good.

I don't know what's worse. The shirtless boys or the hunchbacked Nazi.

Should you go back: No.

Should this game be remade: No. Do what Speilberg can't, put a bullet in Indie.

Retro(game)spective - Phantom 2040

Every day Ben “Ben Pack” Pack or one of his brave compatriots will play a retro game, and break it down for you. That’s right, every day. To complain about us eventually missing a day or suggest your own, go ahead and comment below the article, or email us at retrogamefunclub@gmail.com.

2/14/2011

The Game: Phantom 2040

Release Year: 1995

Skewes: SNES, Genesis, Game Gear

That's what you get for making fun of the purple suit.

So what’s it like: Phantom 2040 may be the first game I've gone into cold that actually isn't shit. And, even stranger, it's a licensed game. Phantom 2040 was an animated television show in the early nineties that was pretty terrible, which itself was based on a comic book character named “The Phantom.” But enough about that, let's talk about the game.

I'm going to geeeet you roooboooot.

There is no plot right off the back, but throughout the game you find out you are a “phantom” who, aside from wearing a rediculous purple outfit, must defeat some shadowy organization from ruling the world. You do this by traveling around an open world to different locations. You get items at each location which help you unlock other items in other stages, sort of like Super Metroid or the modern Castlevania games. Where you go in each chapter effects what happens in the story, and result in different endings.

Man why don't I have a shadow panther. I just have this regular-ass panther.

The gameplay is that of your averege side-scrolling shooter. It doesn't feel a lot different than say a Bionic Commando, in that you even have a gun that lets you swing. The enemies are not difficult at all but the exploration is the key draw to the game. There are over 20 endings to the game, so replayability is huge in this game. I found myself going back to it and while I haven't beaten it more than once, I can see myself continue to try.

Tuck and roll, Phantom. Tuck and roll.

Should you go back: Yes. This is a rare gem worth checking out with solid controls and a lot of replayability.

Should this game be remade: No. This game is, in a way, Shadow Complex. So aside from The Phantom ip being irrelevant, this game has already been made.

Retro(game)spective - Michael Jordan: Chaos in the Windy City

Every day Ben “Ben Pack” Pack or one of his brave compatriots will play a retro game, and break it down for you. That’s right, every day. To complain about us eventually missing a day or suggest your own, go ahead and comment below the article, or email us at retrogamefunclub@gmail.com.

2/13/2011

The Game: Michael Jordan: Chaos in the Windy City

Some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice.

Release Year: 1994

Skewes: SNES

So what’s it like: I've played a lot of terrible games recently, so I decided instead of picking a random game of title alone I would go back and revisit one of my favorite games as a child. Michael Jordan: Chaos in the Windy City seems like one of those freeware games based on concept alone, like Barkley, Shut up and Jam: Gaiden, but it is an actual video game that people were paid real money to make and people paid real money to play it.

Boom shaka-laka

The evil Dr. Maximus Cranium has stolen various members of the NBA, and it's up to Michael Jordan (not the police, or say, the military) to rescue them. He must travel around the windy city (Chicago (that's where his basketball team was (the Bulls))) and rescue various nameless NBA players from all sorts of monsters, robots, and various other non-threatening foes. You do this by doing what MJ does best. Throwing an endless supply of basketballs at things until they explode.

Oh no! Michael Jordan's worst enemy... the press!

This game doesn't control great, it's hard and very unforgiving; but it has a real charm about it. The ridiculousness alone that an athlete is defeating giant robots by throwing balls at it is enough reason to play it and see for yourself. There are puzzles that must be solved by dunking for christ's sake. Maybe the developers didn't put a ton of time into the game, with passwords like 12345678999 or 99999999999, but so what? Do yourself a favor and find a way to play this game.

The many faces of Michael Jordan.

Should you go back: Hell yeah.

Should this game be remade: Yes, in a way. Take someone and put them in a similar situation... I'm thinking something along the lines of “Kanye West: Trouble in Downtown London.”