RetroGame FunClub: 2010

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Tetris Attack

Retro(game)spective

Every day Ben “Ben Pack” Pack or one of his brave compatriots will play a retro game, and break it down for you. That’s right, every day. To complain about us eventually missing a day or suggest your own, go ahead and comment below the article, or email us at retrogamefunclub@gmail.com.

10/13/2010

The Game: Tetris Attack

Because he's attacking the Tetris? Tetri? Tetrominos?

Release Year: 1996

Skewes: SNES, Game Boy

So what’s it like: "Tetris Attack" is a Yoshi-themed puzzle game for the SNES. Following the success of "Yoshi Cookie," Nintendo released this puzzle game that, aside from the game, really isn't like "Tetris" at all.

Those blocks are so shocked!

The main mechanic of the game is that different colored blocks are raising from the bottom up, and you have to match three or more to make them disappear by switching blocks horizontally. If playing against an opponent, clearing multiple blocks at once or linking together the clearing of blocks, you will create barriers that can only be destroyed by clearing blocks adjacent to them. There are various modes, but the main mode is a Vs. mode where you must fight against several opponents and eventually take down Bowser.

Dr. Freezegood is my favorite Batman villain/underground rapper.

The game is fun, and challenging. The Vs. mode is easy enough, but when you get to the higher levels you will find yourself dying often. There is a puzzle mode which, to this day, I could still not beat. The game is fun, and especially so with a friend.

Should you go back: Yes.

Should this game be remade: Yes. Make an iPhone version, for goodness sakes.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Spider-Man and Venom: Maximum Carnage

If you weren't scared of this as a child, you aren't human.

Release Year: 1994

Skewes: SNES, Sega Genesis

So what’s it like: "Spider-Man and Venom: Maximum Carnage," is a video game adaptation of a comic series of the same name. In the game you play as Spider-Man, and eventually Venom, and try to take down the symbiotic known as Carnage, before he murders all of New York City.

Mr. Schwarzenegger from "Commando" would like to have a word with you.

The game is a side-scroller beat 'em up. The game is pretty standard as those types come, with little variation. You can swing as Spider-Man, but since the levels are so short (unless they are the impossibly hard climbing levels), these are useless. You can bring enemies to you or create a shield with your web, but you are best just keeping to your basic punches and kicks. There are lots of bosses, most of them are aggravating, as you have to often fight them two at a time.

Alright Spidey, here's your chance. Don't fuck this one up.

This game is hard, but not "I can beat this if I keep doing it enough" hard. You don't regain lives or health when you beat levels, you can get looped into infinite combos by enemies. There's nothing interesting or innovative of this game, so I wouldn't be upset if it was forgotten in time.

I get it. You're based on a comic book.

Should you go back: No. Go play Final Fight.

Should this game be remade: No.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers

Release Year: 1990

Skewes: NES

So what’s it like: Following the key of most NES licensed games, "Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers" is a side-scrolling (I'm really getting tired of that word) action platformer (those too). You can play as either Chip or Dale, or with a friend. An evil scientist has stolen fellow Rescue Ranger Gadget, and is using her to create something that would... look to be honest I don't know because I couldn't beat the game.

Well thanks for telling me where you hid her...

The game is hard. Full of cheap kills while jumping over obstacles, this is a old-school platformer in every way of the word. The main mechanic besides jumping, is grabbing and throwing items ranging from boxes, to apples. You use these to defeat various animal enemies. The game is hard and cheap, but that was half the fun of games from that era. The game is hard, but not impossibly hard. One of the best parts of this game is that it's one of the earliest instances of girefing in games, as you can throw objects at your partner.

Holy shit ninja squirrels!

Should you go back: Yes. You don't have to beat it, but give it a try.

I don't even know...

Should this game be remade: Yes, because the "Rescue Rangers" is such a prominent pop culture icon. Just kidding.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Claymates

Holographic box holy shiiiiiit.

Release Year: 1993

Skewes: SNES

So what’s it like: "Claymates" is not an erotically themed clay magazine, but rather a platformer for the SNES. The game was published by interplay, and is a predacessor to the :ClayFighter" games. It is the first game in this feature that I never played as a child, so remember this is coming from someone with no nostalgia for this game.

I am a big blue ball of clay trying to fist a squirrel-dog. What have I gotten myself into?

"Claymates" is very similar in style to "Kid Chameleon" You play as Clayton (get it?), a young boy who gets turned into a ball of clay after a mad scientist steals your dad's formula that turns clay alive. So you must traverse different lands as a piece of clay, collecting power-ups that turn you into different animals with different abilities.

Did I just turn into a rat with a supersonic bark?

This game isn't the best. The controls are really floaty, which cause you to get hit, alot. That is a huge problem in istelf because if you get while you're just a clay ball, you die; but if you have an animal upgrade you only revert back to the ball. The problem with that is the power-ups are so few and far between taht you will be dying a whole lot. There is also an overworld which has puzzles, but they are easy and prove to be more of an annoyance than a challenge or something fun.

No.

Should you go back: No. As far as platformers go, there are many more competent ones out there. Go play those. Or just play Super Mario World again.

Should this game be remade: Nope. This game might have been serviceable at the time, but if you never played it as a kid, don't bother going back.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Batman

It's the goddamn Batman.

Release Year: 1989

Skewes: NES, Gameboy

So what’s it like: "Batman," just "Batman," is a side-scrolling action platformer for the NES. You take the role of the caped crusader, as you loosely follow the plot of the 1989 "Batman" film. Your ultimate goal is to fight lots of thugs, robots, and other hazards and eventually take down The Joker.

He's not the hero you want, but he's the hero you deserve... or something.

Your main gameplay mechanics are jumping and attacking (shocking, I know). Not only can you perform regular jumps, but you can (and often must) use wall jumps. You can punch as Batman, which is mostly what you would be doing, But you can also collect ammo for three different weapons. A regular batarang, a spread-shot batarang, and a rocket.

Remember when I said I didn't use guns? I lied.

The game is hard, but like all the best games of the era, can be beaten with enough practice. It's tough to learn when to use your weapons, and when to fight. The platforming is easy enough, and not super unforgiving like other games similar to this (like Ninja Gaiden).

He just punched a dude into flames.

Should you go back: Yes. If you want to play arguably one of the best movie licensed games, if not one of the best NES games of all time, then you should play it.

Should this game be remade: No. Arkham Asylum took care of that

Retro(game)spective - Space Megaforce

Release Year: 1992

Skewes: SNES

So what’s it like: "Space Megaforce," is not only the winner for most generic yet awesome video game name, but it's also a vertical shoot-em-up. It's pretty stock as far as they go, with a few minor exceptions.

That's quite a megaforce, but it's not quite in space now is it.

There are more weapons and variety than in most shmups. There are eight different weapons, each with their own levels of power-ups. Some of the weapons are mostly useless, while some standard ones like the homing missiles and spread shots, always prove to be useful. My favorite weapon created little ships that would fire whenever you fired, and follow your last position.

Look out! It's Mode 7!

Another key difference between this and other shmups, is the health system. You can power up your weapon several times, but every time you get hit, you lose up to 4 powerups. If you have no powerups and you get hit, you die. Think "Sonic" and the rings. This makes the game less frustrating at first, but the levels are long. Very long. The good thing is that you can restart from checkpoints after losing all your lives. The game is fun, but nothing special.

Should you go back: No, there are plenty of better shmups (like U.N. Squadron for example) that deserve playing.

Should this game be remade: No. With plenty of crazy shmups coming out of Japan and other places, this game doesn't need a revival.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Super Star Wars: Return of the Jedi

The prophecy is complete.

Release Year: 1994

Skewes: SNES, Virtual Console

So what’s it like: The third and final chapter in SNES run-and-gun Star Wars games. "Super Star Wars: Return of the Jedi" is the most dramatically different of the three, but it is still fun.

Giant floating collectables, dead ahead.

Like the other games (surprisingly), it's a run-and-gun sidescroller, with a few game-changing exceptions. The most obvious of these changes is the different characters. Each level offers you three different characters to choose from, each with their own weapons and powers. Han has blasters, Luke only has his lightsaber and force powers and there are different Leias with different costumes and different powers.

EAT IT DOUCHEBAG

This game falls back to the first game's love of platforming, to a fault. In the first level there is a lot of platforming on small edges with lots of enemies that can fling you off, because this game is the hardest of the three. Each character also is good in specific levels, which can be aggravating and force a trail-by-error. A fun addition is the Ewok levels, which ads a whole new mechanic with arrows that can be used as platforms.

Should you go back: Yes. If you played the first two, you should play this one too.

Should this game be remade: If you read the last two, you already know the answer.

Monday, October 4, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Super Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back

Well I wonder if they're gonna make a third...

Release Year: 1993

Skewes: SNES, Virtual console

So what’s it like: "Super Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back" is the second game in the SNES triligy of Star Wars films. It plays just like the first one, but with some key exceptions.

Only jerks don't use the lightsaber.

Like the first game, you can play mainly as Luke, and occasionally Han and Chewie. You start off with your lightsaber, which means you don't ever have to, nor should you ever use your blaster. If you are gonna be a jerk and use your gun, you can run and shoot at the same time, making parts much easier. There is less of a focus on the platforming, but the combat feels ramped up to replace this.

Sorry buddy, but in about an hour I'm gonna climb inside of you.

The most major addition are the force powers. There are eight force powers in total, but odds are you won't use most of them. The only ones I found myself using were the heal and the "Sabre Control," which let you move your lightsaber independently of yourself, but costs a lot of force power. Force power can be lost, and regenerated by collecting green orb-like objects.

The game is fun, and not much more difficult than the original. It's harder, but less for the cheap deaths like the first one and instead focuses on killing you with overwhelming enemies. A little more cluttered than the first makes it less fun for me than the first, but still a good game.

Should you go back: Yes. While in my opinion not as good as the first, it is still fun and easily available on the VC.

Should this game be remade: Nope. Same reasons as yesterday.

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Super Star Wars

Retro(game)spective Editor's Note: Apparently instead of publishing this one yesterday, I mearly saved it as a draft. So you got two for today.

Every day Ben “Ben Pack” Pack or one of his brave compatriots will play a retro game, and break it down for you. That’s right, every day. To complain about us eventually missing a day or suggest your own, go ahead and comment below the article, or email us at retrogamefunclub@gmail.com.

10/03/2010

The Game: Super Star Wars

You have no idea how stoaked nine-year-old me was when I opened this on Christmas.

Release Year: 1992

Skewes: SNES, Virtual Console

So what’s it like: “Super Star Wars,” shockingly for the Super Nintendo, is a re-telling of the first (fourth) Star Wars film, “A New Hope.” You play as Luke Skywalker, and you must progress through key events of the film including getting your light saber from Obi-Wan Kenobi, recruiting Han Solo and Chewbacca, and eventually defeating Darth Vader.

Just as annoying in video game.

The game is good, especially if you have a love for the movies (and I have a feeling that you do if you’re reading a video game blog). It plays like a typical side-scrolling shooter with some platforming. The shooting is simple enough, with different weapon upgrades. The enemies include ones seen in the movies, and original creatures that fit in perfectly with the atmosphere.

Reminds me of an ex-girlfriend I once had...

The platforming can get really tricky at times. The bosses can be hard, if not impossible, if you do not have a powered up weapon. Even with both of these, the game is very fun. If you never played any of these games as a child, I'd highly recommend going back. Hell there aren't too many good Star Wars games to choose from.

Holy shit these graphics are blowing my mind!

Should you go back: Yes. Hit up the virtual console versions and relive some of the better days.

Should this game be remade: No. It would be nice to see a new game re-telling the story from the original trilogy, though.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Pit-Fighter

NO GRANDMA, FUCK I SAID PITFALL NOT PIT-FIGHTER.

Release Year: 1990

Skewes: SNES (There were more ports, but they were all so different that I am focusing on the SNES one.)

So what’s it like: “Pit-Fighter” is the worst game ever. Ever. People might say E.T., or Superman 64, but this game makes those look like Shadow of the Colossus.

You're gonna have to pay for that.

“Pit-Fighter” is a fighting game. I think. You play as one of three characters (a kick boxer, a wrestler, and a martial artist) and fight eight other dudes. That’s the story. You can punch, kick, and use a super. If you were to play this game for the first time, you would flail around trying to kick and punch and super your enemies. But if you were like me, you played through this as a child and figured out not only did your parents hate you for buying this, but you could stand over your opponent and punch and punch and punch until you win the game.

HERP DERP DERP

Nobody should have ever played this game, or ever again play this game. I really hope that I was the last person to ever play this, and am really considering a lobotomy to erase any memories of playing this.

Should you go back: No. Never. Even if your family was being held by a kidnapper, and they demanded you play this game for five minutes.

Why is the crowd made out of silly putty?

Should this game be remade: Yes. All the cartridges should be remade into tires or something.

Friday, October 1, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Brain Lord

Brain Lord. The cooler older brother of the Kidney Lord.

Release Year: 1994

Skewes: SNES

So what’s it like: It’s an action RPG. Made by a little company you might have heard of, Enix. Similar in style to a game like “A Link to the Past,“ it is a top-down action RPG. You play the role of a silent protagonist, and after much exposition (who would have guessed there is a lot of story in an Enix game), you must set off to defeat the monsters of five different towers.

Hell yeah it is.

The game plays like most other of the genres. You fight monsters by slashing swords, axes, bows and all sorts of weapons like that. You get gold for defeating enemies and completing the quests, which you can use to buy better weapons and armor. Unlike “A Link to the Past,” you can jump. And this mechanic is put to use a lot in the game, as the player must not only fight, but traverse the levels solving puzzles.

Yeah? You got a Master Sword? Well I can jump.

This game is a lot of fun, and not that well known. The puzzles find a fine line between obvious and dumb, to impossible and requiring a gameFAQ. You can also have two different spirits following you, which allows for some fun customization on your play style.

Cyclops in spandex. The most deadliest of foes.

Should you go back: Yes. Especially if you are a fan of the genre, because it is a good example of how to slightly tweak that sort of game

Should this game be remade: Yes. It would be nice to see more of these games, maybe as downloadable XBA/PSN games. Or an iPhone/DS remake.

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Aladdin

Retro(game)spective

Every day (usually) Ben “Ben Pack” Pack or (rarely) one of his brave compatriots (Mike Bachmann again) will play a retro game, and break it down for you. That’s right, every day. To complain about us eventually missing a day or suggest your own, go ahead and comment below the article, or email us at retrogamefunclub@gmail.com.

9/30/10

The Game: Disney's Aladdin

Release Year: 1993

Skewes: While Aladdin was available for multiple platforms, this particular version only appeared on the SNES.

So what's it like: Aladdin harkens back to the days when licensed Disney games were good..... maybe. I'm not sure if this is the general consensus or if I'm just remembering them a lot more fondly than they deserve to be remembered. You play as Aladdin, a young street rat down on his luck. Forgotten by society, he must transcend his status to become a prince in both mind and soul. Accompanied by his trusty monkey Abu, Aladdin will win the heart of the princess and cast away the darkness of the city.

How does he do that? By jumping on heads and throwing apples at shit!

Aladdin's high-steppin' his way to success.

If you were to play this version at the same time as it's genesis counterpart, the first thing you'd notice is that Aladdin has no sword. The first thing other people would notice is that you apparently have four arms, you freak.

Aladdin has a few tricks up his sleeve in lieu of a blade, however. He can handspring off of most enemies and a few poles and stalagmites, he can throw apples, and he can hang from ledges. They come up with a few interesting ways to use these moves throughout the game but really, nothing much changes. The only exceptions are a couple of magic carpet levels. One was pretty cool: You fly through a cave being chased by lava waves and falling rocks. That's cool. The other, you fly around with Princess Jasmine while collecting games. There's literally no way to lose in that level. Worthless.

Unless you're ready to join the mile high club, lets get on with the next level.

Should you go back: Yeah... you might as well. It's really short. This was the first game I played when I got my super nintendo and I was blown away by the graphics at the time so.... can you really trust me?

What's that? He's gonna cut off her hand for stealing an apple?
Why don't you just give him some of the THIRTY-SEVEN APPLES YOU HAVE, ALADDIN??

Should this game be remade: Nah... it wasn't that great... just pretty good.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

This game was made in Japan? You don't say.

Release Year: 2004

Skewes: Gameboy Advance

So what’s it like: The oldest game I’ve done so far, “Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones” is the second Fire Emblem game to be released in North America. The series is one that holds much revere with fans of turn-based RPGs. The game plays from an overmap view where the player, a mysterious commander with an unknown past, must command units to take care of all enemies.

What makes the game unique are two key features. The first is what they call the weapon triangle. There are three different weapon types, each with many different styles. There are lances, axes, and swords. It’s like rock-paper-scissors where lances beat swords, swords beat axes and axes beat lances.

I think I have enough "HIT" for this one.

Another mechanic, unique to games in general, is that if any of your characters (aside from your main character) die, they are dead. Forever. You can restart the missions if you want to keep your party alive, but this makes the player focus a lot more on really thinking out your moves and gives you more of an attachment to your characters.

Aw shucks.

If you are a perfectionist, this can drive you crazy. But other than that, the game is solid all around, a little hard which is just what you want out of a game like this.

Should you go back: Yes. Maybe you can download it in the newly announced Virtual Console for the 3DS.

Should this game be remade: No, because they are still making new games. A portable edition of the game would be nice… again maybe for the 3DS.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Retro(game)spective - Megaman 7

Not as cool as the Megaman 1 box art, though...

Release Year: 1995

Skewes: SNES

So what’s it like: While I try to cover some more obscure titles on here, I like to occasionally stroll down memory lane on these. Such is the case with “Megaman 7.” My most played SNES game ever, I would say that to this day this is my favorite Megaman game of all time. “Megaman 7” is the first non-NES Megaman, where you play as, guess who, Megaman. And guess what, you’re going to go fight Dr. Wily and the mysterious Bass and Treble.

I don't care what you say, but a seven-year-old me reads that as "Base" and "Trouble"

The game features standard Megaman action. You run in stages shooting robots. You fight 8 different stage bosses, each with their own elemental power which you can gain upon defeating them. These powers can be used to counter other bosses and blah blah blah…

Oh no, bubbles, I'm so scared.

Overall it’s just a re-skinned Megaman with a few fantastic adjustments. There are hidden weapons that will upgrade your suit, including a jetpack, a rocket fist and a shield. They make the seemingly impossible boss fight against Wiley at the end (spoilers) bearable. There is also a shop that you can use to buy not only items like extra lives, but weapon upgrades. You can even buy items that will stop you from dying when you fall off edges or touch spikes. Goddamn spikes.

JUST MAKE HIS SUIT IMMUNE TO THE SPIKES!

Should you go back: YES! Megaman games age well with time, as evident in Megaman 9 & 10, both released on modern consoles. Go back and play it if you haven’t.

Should this game be remade: No. Give us another Megaman Legends instead

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