Retro(game)spective - The Pagemaster

Every day Ben “Ben Pack” Pack or one of his brave compatriots will play a retro game, and break it down for you. That’s right, every day. To complain about us eventually missing a day or suggest your own, go ahead and comment below the article, or email us at retrogamefunclub@gmail.com.

2/10/2011

The Game: The Pagemaster

Release Year:

Skewes: SNES, Genesis, PC

Yeah. Look out he has the power of books. real scary.

So what’s it like: What is worse? Movies based off video games, or video games based off movies? These are the questions that keep me awake at night. Anyway, today's game is “The Pagemaster,” the 1994 Macaulay Culkin, Patrick Stewart, Whoopi Goldberg clusterfuck of a movie that was part real, part cartoon.

Look out! Pedophiles!

The Pagemaster, like 99% of all '90s movie tie-in games it's a sidescrolling platformer. It plays like Mario games in that you collect powerups, and when you are hit you lose the powerups. If you are hit with no powerups you die. Powerups include a shoe that lets you jump higher, slime that lets you climb across ceilings, and a bag of marbles used to throw at enemies. At the end of the level there is a bonus stage where you can collect keys, the game's form of "coins."

HOLY SHIT IT'S LIKE ITS 3D!

The controls are super floaty. His jump is either way to high or not high enough. You can kill some enemies by jumping on them, but some you can't, and it gets really confusing because most of the enemies are book themed. If you get the marbles, which is like the fire flower in Mario, you are pretty much invincible. But the second you lose it, you are as good as dead. There is a world map, but there are very few choices you can make on that map.

Almost as creepy as present-day Culkin.

Should you go back: Nope.

Should this game be remade: No, but the movie should. Just kidding it was awful.